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The Wall
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I,
do hereby hurl

against The Wall.
My reasons are:


Characters remaining:
Don't forget to put both the title and the author.

The only rule for the wall is to hurl books not people. Other than that, be as mean, vicious, and venomous as you like. It's your stress, so let it all out. If you don't like this rule and want to rant against Slake, just email slake@slake.com.

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I, Mathilda, do hereby hurl The Dark-Hunter series by Sherrilyn Kenyon against The Wall.
My reasons are:

I really wish that S.Kenyon would just read her own back stories. I just finished One Silent Night and I am at a total loss! She totally negates what she writes in earlier books and then does these 180 degree character changes. I understand that within a long series that characters do grow and change but they do not get a personality transplant within 2 book. And seriously, how many "ultimate powers" are there? I thought if someone was the ultimate power there could be only one.

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I, LinFen, do hereby hurl TWILIGHT by STEPHANIE MEYER against The Wall.
My reasons are:

While I was out of the country visiting a friend I read this book for lack of any other choices in the English language. Am I the only one who absolutely could not tolerate the heroine and her assinine behaviorisms? I understand that there are 3 more books in this series.

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I, Violet, do hereby hurl Hidden Currents by Christine Feehan against The Wall.
My reasons are:

Reasons why I hated this book: (1) the months-long captivity, rape and torture of the heroine; (2) after which she is magically healed by immediate, ongoing and endless sex with the hero (only days after her rescue and with only token note that she will have scars and flashbacks from her ordeal); (3) who himself dreams of waking up every morning with the heroine sucking his c*ck; (4) while her only desire is to please him however she can; (5) as he constantly calls her "baby"; and (6) promises her a dog, which he does not deliver! With this book, Feehan appears to wrap up her Drake Sisters series, and I end my association with all things Feehan. 27JUL09

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I, Violet, do hereby hurl To Ruin the Duke by Debra Mullins against The Wall.
My reasons are:

Crap, crap, crap. That's all this book is. Everyone, and I mean everyone, in this book is TSTL. Not just run-of-the-mill TSTL, but willfully, obstinately so. No one, and I mean no one, would behave, talk, or think the way they do in this book--not even in a contemporary novel. (I say this because it is ostensibly a historical, but all the characters have decidedly contemporary thoughts, feelings, actions, and speech, which is just another reason why this book is crap. Why even bother calling it a historical? Oh, yeah, 'cause it has a *Duke*.) The more I read this book the angrier I became with the author, editor, and publisher at their arrogance in foisting this crap on readers. We deserve better. 16JUL09

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I, RB, do hereby hurl Diamond in the Rough by Diana Palmer against The Wall.
My reasons are:

This book was such an incredile disappointment! Admitedly Palmer's books usually follow a predictable formula but I like it. This book was just lazy and thrown together. I had to drag myself through it when it was only 182 pages

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I, Darla, do hereby hurl My Man Michael by Lori Foster against The Wall.
My reasons are:

It felt to me like it was just thrown together. For such an advanced culture they were really nieve about alot of things. There was just alot of the book that didn't make sense.

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I, ljj, do hereby hurl First Comes Marriage by Mary Balogh against The Wall.
My reasons are:

This book was boring. The characters were dull. The hero kept talking about how ugly the heroine was. The first love scene must of been written when the author had a bad head cold. All she wanted to do was get it over with so she could go take a nap. Ugh !!

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I, CD, do hereby hurl Liz Maverick's Irreversible against The Wall.
My reasons are:

Someone help me out here. Maybe it's my lack of understanding Physics, relativity, and the quantum mechanics of it all that has me wanting to hurl this book. Outside of Voyager, Quantum Leap, and Time Bandits...my knowledge of time travel is very limited, and I found it hard to follow the author's viewpoint regarding it. Is the author creating some BS just for a story or does she actually know what she's writing about? Of what I’ve read, it seemed too farfetched to be believable even in Theory. I’m willing to be educated in regards to the workings of time travel.

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I, RJ, do hereby hurl The Unfaithful Wife by Lynne Graham against The Wall.
My reasons are:

For those of you haven't read the Unfaithful Wife - STEER CLEAR - i can't see anything redeeming about this book, the heroine is a candidate for a Women's Refuge.. - the H had slept with other women when he married the h, he basically left her in exile to live an empty life with him for five years, during this time she had to put up with snide looks from colleagues at his dinners and she didn't know what she had done. When she actually thinks she's in love with someone else (of course she isn't and doesn't sleep with him) - he forces her into a physical relationship - now that he (His Lordship) is ready to be married to her. There is no grovelling from him (even though i still wouldn't have liked him) he constantly tells her he knows she loves him and still treats her like crap - at the end she finds out it was because her father had blackmailed him into it. His excuse for sleeping with other women and not her - well - he didn't want to sleep with her and cheat on her. He never even spoke to her about why he was that way with her and the author just created a wimp for him to use as a bashing board. An opinion you may have is that because they didn't consumate their marriage it wasn't really infidelity on his part - (the marriage taking place wasn't enough....) now okay fine the 'sleeping with other women' is enough to put me off in itself but the fact that he put the woman he so-called loved (during all that time) in a position where she had to take the humiliation and innuendos from his guests during those five LONG years - makes it even worse (is this a man you could like? can he really be that cruel and not see it?) and then this H had the gall to feel enraged when pictures of her and this other man were nearly printed in the paper. The author then tries to give the impression that his affairs were discreet and just hinted at by his guests, he doesn't even so much as open his mouth to grovel for her at the end - and then the author or Harlequin - rub salt on the wound by friggin thinking of THAT TITLE! - it really was the most awful book - just in case i didn't give you that idea..!

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I, CD, do hereby hurl Enchanted again by: Nancy Madore against The Wall.
My reasons are:

"Nancy Madroe writes erotica with wit, empathy, and passion." -Erotica romance Writers states on the book. However, I found no wit whatsoever in the two stories I skimmed since I couldn't bring myself to actually read them in their entirety. WIT- There wasn’t any in either story I skimmed over. EMPATHY- In one story, the woman kills her lover and sets up her husband to take the blame for it. In the other, a woman has a hex put on a one-night stand lover to make him fall in love w/her and when he finally does, she realizes that he isn’t what she wants and leaves him w/o breaking the hex she had put on him. So, I’m sorry if I don’t agree w/the Romance Writers on their view of empathy. And lastly….PASSION– If you find beating a woman black and blue before the man has intercourse w/her, than that’s your prerogative. I find that extremely disturbing! I will be returning this book and getting my money back. Personally, I think whoever edited this book should be fired since he/she can't tell a good read from a bad one and it made it to the bookstores. The cover cathes the interest but the author isn't good enough to keep it and what a waste of money and time spent on something that many will end up returning for a better read.

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I, Violet, do hereby hurl A Wallflower Christmas by Lisa Kleypas against The Wall.
My reasons are:

If you are a fan of Kleypas' Wallflower series, please avoid this book. It will only leave you angry and frustrated. The very short novel (216 pages, in hardcover, with a hardcover price!) is ostensibly about Rafe Bowman (the older brother of two of the Wallflowers) coming to England to find a bride. This event provides an opportunity for the Wallflowers to reunite and assist Rafe in this endeavour, and supposedly for readers to get a glimpse into the Wallflowers' happy lives. Readers, you are better off leaving their lives to your own imagining than reading about them here! Everything is a cliche (e.g., one Wallflower begins to doubt her husband's love and fidelity, but this instance, like all others, is resolved in a superficial, unsatisfactory, "Silly woman, it's all a misunderstanding" manner). Rafe's character and storyline is actually a step backward for romance. He behaves in a manner than is completely unacceptable in the 19th century (or in the 21st century masquerading as the 19th century as romance novels often are these days). He is boorish and unappealing and behaves as if a woman who says "no" is actually saying "yes." Between Rafe and the now-doormat-like Wallflowers, I thought I was reading a book published in the 1980s! Sample dialogue upon Rafe's first meeting his intended's companion: "This is how we court girls in America. We grab them and kiss them. And if they don't like it, we do it again, harder and longer, until they surrender. It saves us hours of witty repartee." Yes, accosting the companion of the woman one intends to court--in your sister's home no less--is what passes for acceptable, leading-man behavior. I think Kleypas was going for amusing; she succeeding only in evoking feelings of disgust on my part. Readers, if after all this, you still want to read the book (because what can you do, you are still a fan of the Wallflowers), then I suggest you get the book out of the library and save your hard-earned $16.95 plus tax. But I think you'll still hurl the book even if it is a library book.

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I, Kara, do hereby hurl "In A Class By Itself" by Sandra Brown (audio CD) against The Wall.
My reasons are:

Holy god. This is craptacular. The story feels rushed and implausible (even for a romance novel), and seems as though it was written by a twelve-year-old. (Trust me-I remember writing crappy romance fiction in Middle School, and this story reeks of acne soap and Pink Pearl erasers.) The hero is stuck in the past - specifically, ten years ago when he and the heroine were high-school sweethearts. I don't know if it's just how Brown wrote him or how the reader performs the character, but the hero comes across as goofy and dumb. The reader makes him sound like Slingblade; “You really make me hot, french fried potatoes, mmmhmmm.” Billy Bob Dumbass kidnaps the heroine and offers to trade her some land in exchange for a night of sex. The heroine agrees to it barely without a second’s hesitation, and only gets angry when the hero doesn't claim his payment right away. In one scene, the heroine wakes up to find the hero watching her sleep. A friend of mine once locked her boyfriend out of the house and woke to find him watching her; believe me, it’s not sweet – it’s disturbing. Unless you’re in an ICU, no one should be watching you sleep. Honestly, I can’t get into a story that revolves around the premise of two high-school teenagers having such an epic love that kidnapping the woman many years later seems appropriate. I had plenty of boyfriends in high school, but c’mon – if one of them kidnapped me ten years later and tried to trade a piece of land for a night of sex, I’d tear off his “turgid man-root” and make him eat it. (So stop calling me, Matt.) Jesus.

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I, Lesli, do hereby hurl Predatory Game by Christine Feehan against The Wall.
My reasons are:

She didn't do her research. Her hero is in a wheelchair, and she keeps calling his daily chair a "racing chair." My son IS a wheelchair racer, and a racing chair is a specially designed chair, but obviously, she didn't do her research or she wouldn't call his daily chair a "racing chair." Also, he's supposed to be an in-shape, athletic type, and she has him use an electric chair. I don't know a single top in shape w/c racer who uses an electric chair. Also, while I don't mind 3rd omniscient POV, she devolves into head-hopping and makes it confusing to follow the characters' thoughts.

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I, MJ, do hereby hurl Into The Night against The Wall.
My reasons are:

I have been a loyal Brockmann fan since reading Prince Joe for the first time. Since then I have read every single book that Suzanne Brockmann has written and I have loved them all. So it really pains me to say that I am immensely disappointed and depressed after reading Into The Fire. Brockmann’s trademark flawed characters have always been a favorite of mine, but the character flaws unveiled in this book are overwhelming. By the end of the book I could no longer appreciate most of the characters and I just felt pity for the rest. I have to say that this will definitely be the LAST book from Brockmann that I will buy on sight.

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I, Kallyjaine, do hereby hurl Undead and Unworthy against The Wall.
My reasons are:

What Happened? I really liked MJD before this book. I would buy them the minute they hit the shelf, and then she goes and just ruins the whole thing!! It wasn't that funny and it good. Betsy is just weird, the Ant shouldn’t even get a mention (filler much), Nick is an over-the-top hater, and the rest haven’t evolved one iota. Oh, except the ones SHE KILLS OFF! I'm sooooooo disappointed that she did that. And the way they died was overly ridiculous, Ugh. I was expecting to read a romance novel NOT a fracking tragedy. Boo Hiss! Hellooooooo! Note to MJD: killing off people you wrote a previously love story about is SHEISTY!!!!!! Geez, way to alienate the readers. If she is just going to keep kill off couples; I’m Out! You let me down MJD. Big time.

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I, Courtney, do hereby hurl Lover Enshrined by J. R. Ward against The Wall.
My reasons are:

This one was really disappointing because I have loved all of the other Brotherhood books. However there were very few scenes between the heroine and the hero compared to how much air time all the other characters got. It was like she is trying to do what Kenyon did and create new characters who will eventually have their own books. There was absolutely no romance in this book at all and I had to force myself to finish it. Another thing that bothered me was that some of the other future Brothers are GAY! I have no problem with homosexuality but at the same time I DO NOT want to read through a guy on guy love scene!! Ms. Ward stick to the romance!!

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I, Janel, do hereby hurl fake book reviews against The Wall.
My reasons are:

I like to check out the reviews--especially on Amazon.com right when new books come out. Most of the time Harriett Klausner is the first person to review the book and it seems like no matter how horrid the plot, undefined the characters and mediocre the entire book is she gives it 5 stars. As a matter of fact I went to all of her reviews and only found a few FOUR star ratings. Her reviews have become meaningless.

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I, Sarah, do hereby hurl Judith McNaught's historicals against The Wall.
My reasons are:

Why is it that all these historicals have "heroes" that essentially sexually assault the heroines in some way. They either cause them pain while attempting to kiss them or rape them, for heaven's sake. Is this supposed to be sexy? I don't think so.

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I, Sarah, do hereby hurl Seduced by Magic by Cheyenne MacCrey against The Wall.
My reasons are:

It was awful! It had absolutely no plot. I had to force my self to fininsh it, you know, I'm all for freedom of religion and have nothing against Wicca. When the author incoporated spells and casting into the novel, however it destroyed my willing suspension of disbeleif.

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I, CD, do hereby hurl Call of the Highland Moon by Kendra Castle against The Wall.
My reasons are:

I honestly tried to enjoy this book but by chap 3...it was hurled. Too wordy; and if that isn't enough the author has to add more by adding extra nonsense in parenthesis! Good grief. No one wants to read a comment by the hero and then read 2-3 pages of crap before the heroine answers back or vice versa. By then the reader forgets what the conversation is about! I honestly can't stand reading books written in this kind of style.

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I, BZHAnne, do hereby hurl To Propose to a Prince against The Wall.
My reasons are:

As some of you know, I have a "thing" about historical inaccuracies in my historical romances. But this one takes the cake. The hero is comparing the heroine to, better sit down for this one: Michaelangelo's MONA LISA! HELLOOOOH! Did none of these people ever hear of a dude named Leonardo daVinci? Deborah Raleigh, the author, failed to catch it, her editor failed to catch it, the proofreader failed to catch it, the printer failed to catch it. How many other publishing houses are harboring fugitives from the public school UNeducation system? The rest of the story was too formulaic, the hero was another in a long line of stubborn dunces, the heroine was so stiff with misplaced pride one couldn't feel really synpathetic toward her plight and the whole premise was too far-fetched for my willing suspension of disbelief to suspend a thread, much less this unsatisfactory wall banger. *sigh*

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I, Violet, do hereby hurl Enchanting the Lady by Kathryne Kennedy against The Wall.
My reasons are:

OK, maybe it's not a hurl, more like a toss, but I couldn't put this book on the pedestal no matter how much I wanted to. This book had a great premise: Victorian England, where a person's rank is determined by his or her magical ability rather than bloodlines. So, princes are the most powerful magically, followed by dukes and duchesses, and so on down the line. It a very rich world mixing history and fantasy, and I would have loved to love it. But, unfortunately, the early momentum of the book is not sustained in the later chapters. The characters and are not fully fleshed out, and situations are not fully explained. (And now for a minor diatribe on my part: Ultimately I could not get past the doormat of a heroine. I realize the heroine is under a curse, which dulls her looks and abilities, so her stunning naivete and saccharine sweetness are somewhat explained. I forgave it up to a point, but I could only take so much, not a whole book full of it! Just once, when the hero says, "Trust me, don't leave the house," I would like the heroine to actually trust him and follow his advice, and not say, "Oh, he must not have meant it," or "Nothing is going to happen to me," or "He's just worrying, the silly billy," or whatever. But she does leave the house, and unfortunately does not get run over by a bus. Yes, by this point in the book, I was hoping for something surprising to happen, but nothing did, all the action was telegraphed and formulaic.) Anyway, the Amazon.com reviewers who gave the book 3 stars have it right; it's not a 5-star book. That said, I will try the next in the series in hopes that the author improves. I do like the idea of the story (and the world the author has built), just not the execution of it in this book.

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I, anonomys, do hereby hurl all romance books against The Wall.
My reasons are:

I don't know what's going on but I've managed to find 1 good book out of about 5. All the same stories, same stupid heroines, same, same, same.

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I, CD, do hereby hurl Predatory Game by Christine Feehan against The Wall.
My reasons are:

Here in this book, you have a very dangerous assassin who can kill w/a touch. A perfect weapon if she didn’t end up violently ill and rolling in pain each time she engaged the enemy. But I couldn’t help noticing she was able to stand in the midst of a violent thunderstorm w/lightening flashing and having no repercussions, but she’s violently ill when pulling a trigger on a gun? Or in hand to hand combat? Come on! If Mother Nature doesn’t take her out, than anything man-made surely shouldn’t have the drawbacks as it does. By all accounts the psych abilities should only be affected when in use; so why the pain when she is in hand to hand combat or is firing a weapon? This doesn’t make sense to me.

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I, Sweetdoggie, do hereby hurl The Harlequin by Laurell K. Hamilton against The Wall.
My reasons are:

Well, congratulations, Ms. Hamilton. I now hate every single character you've created with a fiery passion. I am sick of Anita never raising a zombie, or if she does, doing something stupid and messing things up. I'm so sick of the whole bondage leather-wear thing. I'm deathly tired of the incredibly boring sex scenes with multiple partners. I'm so very tired of none of these people being able to come to terms with anything in their lives. Or rather, pretending that they are going to be OK and in the very next sentence, going back over the same old ground that has been covered a billion times before. Not only do I not care about Anita's problems, I'm secretly hoping that Marmie Noir, the head vampire honcho, will actually wake up and eat all of them.

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